A Day in the Life of the Christy's Part 1

I get asked often about homeschooling. People want to know how I can teach High School and how I include the toddlers and baby. These are very good questions. I usually shrug with some dumbfounded look on my face when I'm asked. Thank God for blogs! I can sit quietly and think about it. What exactly do I do?

Let me start with the first day of the week, Sunday. After Mass, 1/2 my kids are hauled off to Taco Bell by Mary Kate's idol and Josie's Godmother, Mary Seura. My parents come over to play games after their Mass at Our Lady of Good Counsel. They take Mary Kate home with them to spend the next day at the Fransiscan Center volunteering with the Sisters. Later in the day  I try to find about 2 hours to sit down with the cutest and tiniest laptop ever (thanks Nana) and work on putting the kids homework in my Homeschool Tracker. It is a software program for homeschoolers to keep track of homework, grades, hours, test scores, transcripts, etc. I can't think of anything this program can not do.  I copy all of their assignments and put them in their personal report cover that carries all the previous assignments for the year. The little kids have one page per week. Nick has 3 pages per week that has detailed explanations about each assignment, which is why it is so long.

Sunday night, after quiet time, prayer time and bedtime, I sit at my computer and study the next 3 lessons of Algebra .  I then prepare a preschool curriculum which usually begins with me slapping myself for not ordering the much needed library books for the little kids. Now I have to come up with something else! Fear not, my house is full of preschool stuff. By about midnight, I'm ready for bed.

Monday morning, we leave the house at 8:30, drop off Theresa at school (she's in 2nd grade at the public school...another blog subject), then we are headed to another homeschool family's home who is next in the rotation of our 4 families. Class #1 Speech for High School, Spotlight on the Saints with the middle children (cute modern day play's based on a Saints virtue), and preschooler's with me and another mom, Carol. Class #2 is Algebra with the High School (ME!), Life Science with the middle ones and Science with the preschoolers. Class #3 is PE for everyone. The host of the home makes lunch for the moms.  Every 4 weeks, we watch the middle kids perform their play after lunch. This co-op is simple, small, cozy and fun. All the kids enjoy it. I feel like I'm with the finest families in the world, each with their own special gifts. The Defeo's have 9 children (8 girls and 1 boy...LOL...I know, right?) The Samsons have 7 children (the 7th due in 2 months). The Hilboldts have 8 children (6 grown. Its important to note that I was 5 years old when they got married. I'm sure Carol wants everyone to know this. LOL). Then there is me that only hits the average in number of children.  We go home and finish the school day with learning about the artist of the week, usually by video while open books of the artists famous paintings lie open on my bed.  Mary Kate has arrived back home by then and Theresa will arriving home by dinner. Yes, dinner! She has tutoring after school twice a week. She is going to be a genius when I start homeschooling her next year.  Currently, I am picking up Theresa from school and taking the 3 kids to their King & I rehearsals at Red Bridge Bible Church. That lasts throughout the evening. School of Religion and Boy Scouts are put on the back burner until this is finished in a couple weeks. They are having SO much fun. Roy and Nick play volleyball at the Shawnee Mission Civic Center and I am listening to small crashes, a few screams and shooing little people off my lap while I type this. 

The preschoolers doing their Nativity play. That 45 seconds said it all.

This is the practical life of our first 2 days. Add in some laughing and smooching and you just lived 2 days of my amazing and blessed life.  Honestly, I don't know why people care. I just know that I'm asked frequently about what I do and how I have time. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to pick up all the important documents the toddlers climbed up the bookshelves to dump on the floor for no reason. Then  I have a load of diapers to wash (useless fact...I can complete this task in 34 seconds; the amount of time it takes me to hold my breath). And maybe, while I clean relentlessly, I might find the phone thats been off the hook for hours. Until Part 2.....

Cub Scouts

Well, its over. We graduated my Webelos den to Boy Scouts on Saturday. I spent the last couple weeks thinking about what I wanted to say in my good-bye speech. Every time I thought about it, I would tear up. The last 4 and a half years with these boys have been wonderful. I have so many memories. Most of them involved calming them down from all their excitement. That is what I loved most about these boys. They all seemed so happy to be with me and each other. It didn't matter what we were doing, they were happy to be there. We could be scooping up piles of poop and they would be happy to do it just because they were together. That is what I will miss the most. Geez! I'm tearing up again!!

Sam Hoffman

 The red head! He loves to fish and do anything outdoors. He is an only child but was supplemented with land and nature and all the animals Mom would bring home from work. He studied acting as his extra-curricular activity. He was such a joy to have in the den meetings.

Nicholas Mott

He comes from a home of little people. LOL. They are such a cute family.  He loves to read and is always the first to volunteer when reading was involved. If I were faced with something important that needed to be done, I went to him first because I knew he would do a good job. 

Jacob Mincey

His mind seemed to be on other things a lot. This is an adorable feature. I could see his little mind in a complete other world. When others thought he was being rude, I could clearly see that his mind was just occupied. I loved being able to match my den meetings with his active imagination.

Davey Merchant

He came to us just a couple years ago from Oklahoma. He is full of stories, most of them disgusting. Haha. We loved to hear them though. He is great at building little, and sometimes not-so-little, projects. One project was a cub mobile! One day, he will teach my kids how to turn a real live cow into dinner on the kitchen table...one of his other gifts:) He chased me with a dead mouse once and I haven't  forgiven him yet.

Joshua Valdez

 Ahhh. My most dedicated scout. He would come early and stay late to all the den meetings. And his sister, Alicia, was close behind. She comes in and grabs whatever baby I had just had.  Joshua was so happy to be here even if my 4 year old beat him up. He always walked in my front door with the same smile. I'm going to miss that smile.

Austin Vaughn

 The studious scout. This is the scout that listened and paid attention and truly did his best with every project or assignment he was given. If I asked him to write a few words about something, he wrote 2 pages. If I asked him to draw me the layers of a forest, I would get all the creatures, and details that made it come alive.

Max Christy

This is the boy that had to take a back seat to everyone else. Sometimes he would miss the back seat altogether when his parents would completely forget to take him to a Pack Meeting or den meeting. He would sit at home with his uniform on, wondering where we went. Whenever I, the awards chairman, was one award short, I would pull it off his uniform. If the den leader, me, was one project short, he would get left out. Thank goodness he has such a good sense of humor.

These are my scouts. I love them all. I love their aggressiveness, their laughter, their disgusting jokes, their choke holds (on each other, not me), their manners when guests were around and their dedication to living the scout oath and law. I miss them so much. Why did God have to make time so fleeting? I hope they remember me when they are old with kids of their own. As their childhood memories fade, I pray they will all have fond memories of their den mother, Mrs. Christy. I love you boys!

Farmville

Sounds like I'm running out of things to blog about doesn't it. No, no. Farmville is actually just an example of a bigger subject that I want to blog about today. It is no surprise to anyone who knows me that I really enjoy playing Farmville. There are two big reasons for this.  #1 I can play with my friends and family and, in turn, builds up our relationship even more. That is the purpose of playing a game around the kitchen table right? It bonds the family closer. Is it a waste of time to play Monopoly with the family? I can hear your head rattling so that must be a "no". Then, neither is playing Farmville. The only difference is that I can play with my Mom, the kids, my niece and nephew and friends continuously whenever I am able. I'm not bound to a certain time and place. Kids can interrupt me and it is ok.  I can choose to play a lot or a little or even skipping a few days without bothering anyone (except Mom).  The game is designed to play with one another through gifting and helping others. It does not take away from the gifting and helping in real life. I still make a real meal for my friend who has just has a baby instead of just offering her a virtual fruitcake for her farm:)  And I will always drop what I'm doing to sit at the table to play a game with the family...not a puzzle though. Thats Dad's thing.  

#2 It is a stress reliever. It is simple, enjoyable, calming and a small piece of my life that I can have control over. (Except when the 3 year old sells my stuff!!!! I keep setting her on the corner when she sells my swimming pool, train, mansion, etc. but she keeps running back home. LOL. I'm only partially joking).  I am not one that is under stress but I think there is a reason for this and no, its not drugs:) All of us need to have an avenue to calm ourselves when life gets a little busy. For some that could be a power nap  or scrapbooking, writing in a journal or reading.  Ice cream, jogging, etc. You get the idea.  I like to do a little of each but Farmville is on the top of my list. The more upset I get, the more farming  I do.  If there is anyone reading this who does not have a meaningless relaxer to bring yourself back down to Earth, I hope you will consider acquiring one soon.  Farmville is mine:)

I'm Not Feelin' It

The first few years of our marriage  I asked my husband, Roy,  if he would take the reigns as the spiritual head of our household. I'm old fashion and believe that husbands and fathers should be the head of the household.  I asked him to have talks with the kids (mainly just the oldest at the time) about God and Faith. I asked if he would take the RCIA classes and join my Catholic Faith.  His objections were simple and I think they reflect the objections a lot of men have. "I'm not qualified" and, "I'm not feeling it." I completely understand that, especially the "I'm not qualified" excuse. A few years back, our Cub Scout pack was in need of a good leader. Roy did not want to take on the position because he was "unqualified" but he did it anyway because he had the energy, discipline, attitude and drive. I remember sitting on the committee when a couple "seasoned" scouters were talking about the pancakes they were going to eat on a camp out. Roy interjected and offered to buy the pancake mix at the store. The 2 men snickered because all qualified scouters know that you make everything from scratch. My body started to heat up as I saw Roys head bow down in embarrassment. I was ready to jump onto the table and throw myself on those men who snickered. It was going to be just like what you see in the movies...the chairs go flying, some strangling, heads knocking together, people pulling me off... That would make a good story but I stayed put. Roys head rose up and he continued taking part in the conversation.  My body temperature eventually went down and his scouting career has taken off. We will be attending a dinner where he will receive the District Award of Merit. It is well deserved.

 When Roy began teaching Theology of the Body for Teens, he felt like he was the most unqualified person out there. Thanks to the desperation of having a 15 year old in dire need of this class with no one to teach it, he made the leap. On his first day of class, he was nervous, his eyes were tearing up, he was anxious and jumpy and just down right scared to death. It is true that he would be considered "unqualified" but he moved forward and learned right along side the kids. His assistant, the beautiful young Jackie Wild, was a cradle Catholic who has spent at least 20 years learning more and more about her Faith. I admire my husband for working side by side with someone a normal "unqualified" person would be intimidated by. Lucky for him, Jackie is a humble and forgiving assistant:)

I really wanted to write this blog because I know that some of you reading this might have a husband sitting at home while you and the kids go to church. Or you have a husband that is just waiting to have that loving feeling for God before he acts on it. Or he is waiting around to be "qualified".  This is one of those situations where decisions are made in spite of what and how we are feeling. One thing I love about my Faith is that I can and want to be obedient whether I understand it or not because I trust my faith. My Catholic Faith is my foundation and I trust it more then I trust the foundation of my home that I entrust my life and my kids life to every day and night. The understanding will come later, either in this life or the next. For now, if I remain obedient, I will reap what I sow and it will be good. My darling husband is just like that. He tells himself that he's going to do the right thing whether he's feeling it or not. He can pray that God will gift him with the feelings to blast him forward with great zeal. If your husband is waiting for some magic wand to put these feelings in him before he acts, he will be waiting longer then it takes for his kids to grow up and out. We are given free will so we can freely love him. Love is an action and a choice. We need to be open and act. If he isn't "feeling it", encourage him to go someplace where he CAN feel it....adoration, Familia, a Bible Study, a training class for TOB, revivals during Lent, etc.

I have been blessed with a very humble man. This is not the opposite of pride. It is the fulfillment of it.  He is what I call a "REAL" man. A man that protects, provides and cares for his family while falling to his knee's as a weak sinner in the presence of our Lord. He has inspired me to take the leap of faith too. Pardon my constant repitition of the TOB class for adults that I am facilitating but it is important to note that this is the first time that I've ever stuck my neck out so far. I too am nervous and unqualified. I am going for it anyway! Why? For two reasons #1 TOB is the next sexual revolution and #2 My husband has inspired me to do so.

Bottom line... a good, humble, loving and faithful  husband of pride and values can empower the entire family. And I have it. I love you Roy. I am very blessed to have you.

Matthew

My darling little baby turns one on the 23rd of January. He was due on the 22nd but missed it by 38 minutes. I so wanted him to be born on his due date. January 22nd is the anniversary of Roe v Wade, when the court decided 38 years ago to exclude the unborn in the constitutional right to life through the horrific act of abortion. I have a passion for the pro-life cause. I wish everyone could put themselves in the tiny feet of an unborn baby and watch and feel what they have to go through in an abortion procedure. How different our world would be! Instead we leave it to our imagination. I suspect that these images must be blocked from those that call themselves pro-choice.

When I was a teenager, I was almost radical about the pro-life cause. If I caught even a hint that someone wasn't 100% pro-life, I was on him or her like white on rice. You could not stop me from talking and I'm ashamed to admit it but I lacked compassion in these "talks" too. I have since matured, thank God! Years ago, I volunteered at the pro-life booth at the Santa Calagon in Independence. I had done that every labor day for several years. Each year was the same. People would politely see what our booth was about, thank us, buy a shirt or a bumper sticker, maybe drop a dollar in our donation jar. Then as the day began to grow darker, the number of guests stayed the same but fewer people came to our booth for a visit. As it got darker, our supporters were gone and the pro-choicers were running rampant. People would yell and criticize us. How ironic that this always happened in the dark. It reminded me about all the Bible stories I read  when evil took over the story. It was almost always in the night. Out of the blue, in the darkness, a girl walked up to our booth and looked around slowly. Her eyes locked on our plastic babies that represented  what a baby looked like at that stage of development. I didn't know what to say. It was dark, the supporters have seemed to be home and tucked away in bed, so, who was she? Is she about to throw one of these babies at me? Is she going to start yelling? Crying? So I said the only thing that I could think of....get ready...."Hi". She looked at me and said, "I'm scheduled to have an abortion on Wednesday." I didn't know what to say. I was shocked. Here I am working this pro-life booth and it never occurred to me that I could be faced with this. I'm glad that I was struck speechless because it gave me the chance to look into her eyes. She wasn't there to debate me. She had such deep sadness in her eyes. It was the kind of sadness you would see in someone who just ran over a child in their car. The.."What have I done??" look, even though she had done nothing yet. It was scheduled and her baby was as good as dead. With my mother standing right next to me as cool and calm as she was, she listened to me tell the girl my story. Yes, this goody-goody, unmarried girl with her chastity bumper sticker got pregnant at 20. I told her where I went for help (Birthright) and how they compassionately helped me through this ordeal, even ready to help me find a home with a loving 2 parent family for my baby.  I had a stack of resources stapled together with "Do Not Remove From Booth" written on the front cover. Trying to hide the shaking of my hand and arm, I handed her the whole packet. I wanted to cry for this girl. I was so numb. I saw a glimmer of hope in her eyes as I told her my story. I do not know her story though. I do not know if she ever kept her appointment. I will probably never know. The look on her face is forever sketched in my mind. I am not praying outside of abortion clinics just for the life of the unborn babies that go in there but for the mom's that walk in suffering the way this girl was.

Now, my little man turns one today. I have taken advantage of every day with him. I love feeling seasoned with mommyhood. I can love on my baby without the weight of worry or stress that new mom's have. I nurse him like he could be my last, rubbing his hair and caressing his cheek and picking the  wax out of his ear:) I love every single diaper change so much that I can't wait for the next one....unless its a disposable diaper. Then I just grumble that it cost 13 cents and  leave it on him until I get all 13 cents worth of it.  Nothing in my life is more efficient then how I wash and care for the diapers. My life would be totally complete with just me and my baby....BUT...it gets even better! I have 7 other children that I get to love and reminisce of their baby days. I have 8 times as many baby stories! I want to talk people into valuing life but I believe my best hope for this is through my example. I have not met one pro-choice person since my teenage years. Sounds weird right? There are so many but I can't point to anyone I know and say that they are pro-choice. Why is that? They must be out there. I hope it is because when people see me, it sits right there on my hip and they can see it in my eyes and in my life that this person values life of all sizes.

                                                 My baby Matthew with big sister Josie

Facebook Defense

Facebook is such a hot topic. There are those who love and spend way too much time it (me). Then there are others that think it is the work of the devil (my darling hubby). I think the reservation people have is a direct result of what they see on TV and the news. Facebook has caused so many problems! It can cost people their jobs. It is a near occasion of  sinful lustful thoughts in our young boys and a temptation for girls to ignorantly satisfy those desires.  People will gossip to a wider audience. Relationships crumble, as people are more apt to speak their mind behind a computer screen.  It can leak sensitive information to the enemy in the time of war...(I'm married to an officer...I had to add this to make him happy).  Yes, Facebook can be a serious vice for some. BUT, it can be used for a greater good as well. It can be used to glorify God if used properly.

I opened my Facebook account about 2 years ago. (Geez, it seems like so much longer!) My son, Nick, had opened up an account and was asking me questions on how to do it. I panicked and ran straight to my computer to ask my trusted homeschool loop what their opinion was. To my surprise, most everyone was in favor and they were all on the same page about monitoring it. So, thats what I did. I opened my account for the soul purpose of spying on my son.  And boy do I spy! There should be some kind of award for how well and frequently I spy.  If Obama can get a Nobel Peace Prize for just having some warm and fuzzy feelings, there should be something for me!  This is where I begin my defense of Facebook.

1. My kids can see the real love for God their friends have that isn't talked about when they are together playing video games, sledding or watching a movie.  

2. I can answer all the questions I get from the friend to the stranger, "How do you do it?...How can you afford it?...Don't you go crazy?...Do you get any free time?...etc. etc. etc.!

3. My acquaintances are now my friends. I'm talking to more people in the vestibule at my church now

4. Farmville (There will be a Farmville blog soon!)

5. I can see the hurt that some people go through and be there for them....especially the teens

6. I can promote my causes (Prolife, Conservative candidate, Boy Scouts, Theology of the Body, chastity talks, etc.)

7. My neighbors don't have to think I'm just an old woman in a shoe. I actually have a life that I enjoy and that is worth reading about.

8. It has opened discussions with Nick about what is appropriate and what isn't. (Don't complain about your boss on your status!)

9. My kids have priests and brothers on their friends lists and have developed closer relationships with them. (No nuns yet. Guess their too busy for Facebook:)

10. We grow closer to our faith by sharing our faith with one another, even those who have none or who have questions for us.

11. I can have small, meaningless, fun talks with people that help build relationships.

12. Don't have to wait until Christmas to "catch up"

13. Its a great avenue to ask for prayers

14. You can laugh more often and make others laugh. It keeps the world happy.

15. I have no time for non-virtual friends. I can get my fix here.

16. I am constantly learning. I can post a math question on my status and get the answer a few minutes later.

17. I have watched my son talk to girls on Chat about their purity and what it is worth. I have to hide in the bathroom and read it. He usually falls asleep 1/2 way through reading my blogs which was about #10 so he probably won't see this.

18. I can play and have fun with my kids on Facebook. We play games, and have cute "I Love You's" being posted back and forth.

19. I can now keep in touch with aunts and cousins that I had given up on ever seeing again

20. We can plan a grade school and High School reunion

My biggest pet peeve is not with Facebook but with parents who don't pay attention to what their kids are doing on it. I can't tell you the number of times that I have shared information with parents about their own kids that they didn't know. Some good, some funny, some very serious. I don't suggest that you learn all of my spy skills (I may or may not go overboard:). But, when your child is hurting, 1500 people shouldn't hear about it before you. Your child is more important than anything that is keeping you too busy to keep yourself up-to-date. When it gets abused, snatch it away like a thief in the night. When it is used to bring you and your friends closer to each other and to God, watch the blessings come down. It will be a virtue or a vice. Make it a virtue or cut it off.

No Curfews! Freedom!

My son, Nick, is 17 years old. Wow, how time flies! It makes me glad we chose to be open to life. Who knew that parenthood would be so fleeting? I'm so happy that we are making it last longer then most. When my last child leaves, I want to wipe my forehead and say, "Whew! That was a good ride." If I only had one or two kids, I imagine I would be confused and bewildered.  What did we do with our time? And what are we going to do with all this time left?!!

I remember being a teenager. Stop laughing! It wasn't that long ago! Anyway, it was very common for all of my friends, and myself, to have curfew. Usually midnight. If you had a really strict parent, it was 11:00. How funny that all seems to me now. Lets be honest. What that really means, is if the movie got out at 11:00, you had an hour to "park". I mean, bringing your date home before curfew meant you really didn't want to spend every available minute with her, therefore, didn't really care about her. Being so old...I mean...wise and experienced, I pondered how I would deal with this when I had my own teenager. It wasn't until I studied Theology of the Body (thank GOD I did this before Nick got his license!) that I realized my answer! Its FREEDOM. Thats what teenagers truly desire. They all want their freedom. If I restrict that, then the rebelling will begin! Sounds like I'm giving up doesn't it? Well, no. We needed to teach Nick what freedom means. When he truly understood, no restrictions would ever be necessary. For example, do I need the commandment to not kill my husband? Am I walking around completely ticked off that God has restricted me from taking his life every time he walks in the door? Why is that? Maybe its because I have true freedom to love the way God intended me to love. If we desire to do Gods will and desire to live with Him in His eternal exchange of love, I will not need these rules and commandments. They will already be in my heart. This is what Roy and I needed to teach Nick and our other kids kicking at his heels to grow up.

Under my darling husbands instruction, Nick took a 6 month course in Pope John Paul II's Theology of the Body for Teens. What a gift! This class covered everything...chastity, love, the purpose of our bodies, vocations, marriage, how Christ was the groom and His Church, the bride. It taught him how a groom loves his bride the way Christ loves His bride. It went in detail exactly how Christ loves His bride. 12 classes, 3 hours each. Roy made it fun, filling it with his closest friends, having pizza parties, lively discussions, a retreat, New Years Eve party, and finishing off nearly every meeting with a youth group function across the hall. Nick enjoyed it so much that he came back the following year to do the class again. One day when I was complaining for the hundredth time that he hates to read, he replied, "I don't like reading anything unless its Theology of the Body". I kept my mouth shut after that. I'm sure I will be opening it back up soon. He really does have to read other things!

This is one of our beloved students, Kerrianne, using her imagination with playdough on how she see's her relationship with God at the TOB retreat.

I told Nick that our city has a curfew for teenagers. He asks, "Whats a curfew?" I smiled. My teenager doesn't even know what a curfew is. He has no desire to come home late. He has no desire to use another person for his own gratification. He has no desire to turn others away from God. He does not need a curfew. I am so proud of Him. I thank JPII from the bottom of my heart. God has revealed to Him a truth at a time when it was needed the most in our post-sexual revolution world.

Please watch future blogs and Facebook status' of upcoming TOB classes for teens and adults.