On December 31st, 2012, I was speeding to my friend’s house whose son had passed away that morning. I was already asking him for favors. I asked him for a baby. Every month I would ask Roy if he thinks God is finished blessing me with children. One time he said, “Maybe God has something he wants to do with you first.” Maybe so. Or, maybe He is finished. After all, I am 40 and my clock is ticking or has clicked its last tock.
Roy was right. I was busier than I had ever been in January. Had I been pregnant, I would have been useless with vomiting and crawling around like a college student’s hangover….(not that I would know ANYTHING about that…..just sayin’). On the weekend that the homeschoolers were having an extreme makeover done on Nolan’s family’s house, I took a pregnancy test. It was positive. I thought it would be a fitting time to see if Nolan’s prayers had been answered with a yes.
For my non-Catholic friends, Catholics do not believe in a separation between us and those in Heaven. We do not believe that they have become incapable of praying on our behalf the way our friends on Earth do. We do not believe that they cannot see or hear us anymore. They are our brothers and sister’s who are now close to God and can intercede for us the same way we ask our friends, family and neighbors to intercede for us in prayer. I asked Nolan to intercede.
I know that there are many people reading this and confused as hell as to why a mother of 8 is begging for more. The answer is simple. It’s because I’m the mother of 8. I have a front row seat into the life of a big family. I see the benefits that other people with “2 kids are all I can handle” cannot see. They see loss of money, buying food in bulk, crying, screaming, fighting, losing one kid unnoticed, keeping up with toddlers, 20 years of poopy diapers, etc. I better stop. I’m already talking myself out of wanting more.
Focus!! What I see is a constant party, always having a friend, always having something to do, never hearing “I’m bored”, no one sitting in front of the TV or video games, defending and loving each other, giggling, laughing, long talks with a teenager at night, lots of wrestling, always having a cuddle buddy in bed, making any small event into a party just by showing up, scaring off wanna be bad guys from messing with our house, breastfeeding, pictures, stares in the restaurant, having your own cheering section for a sibling’s ball game, people looking at me like a super hero, 6 kids whispering and giggling every night in one room, etc. etc. I wish I had the time, energy and creativity to put into words the joys of having a large family. I am forever seeing the benefits. Parents of many kids seem to enjoy every pleasure of life so much more. A shower can feel as good for me as a shower for someone who has been stranded in the desert for a month. A night out with my husband can feel as good as a first date with your first major crush. Everything just feels better. So……
When someone asks me if I’m going to have any more kids, my answer is always the same.
“I never want to stop.”